Wednesday, October 10, 2007

I Love My Dog More Than You Love Your Polygamist Goat Colony, Part I

This is my doggy, Blair Warner. She is really cute.

See everyone, see what a good doggie mommy I am? Because I am such a good doggie mommy, you shouldn't be allowed to form your polygamist goat colony (which will happen when gays are allowed to get married).

*Obligatory cute story*
Blair Warner has been mysteriously finding treats around the house that we haven't given her. Every day when we get home from work, Blair Warner runs straight into the spare bedroom and emerges with a treat each time.

We thought this was because she was storing treats previously given to her. Or something.

Today, the mystery was solved.

A previous house guest and guest-doggy had left a box of treats under a pile of blankets, unbeknownst to us.

Blair Warner has somehow found this out, and has used it to her advantage. The box is almost empty now.
Moral of the Story: Although not fully housebroken, and really yappy, little dogs can be surprisingly smart.
Oh, and of course, this means you shouldn't be able to form your Polygamist Goat Colony.


Rachel M. said...

If you allow polygamist goat colonies to form you'll have to let mothers marry their daughters. When's it gonna end? How far is too far?! Until I see proof that closely related polygamist goats can raise healthy happy kids (no pun intended!) No way do they deserve the same rights as human moms with little dogs! NO WAY, JOSE!

Fannie said...


Rachel M. said...

Oh right! And by, "nice" do you mean, "I HATE BABIES!", fannie?! whatever. go to college.

Jane Know said...

The human mom/doggy relationship is truly superior in every way. It's an "Institution" if you will. By allowing goats to enter that Institution (polygamists, nonetheless), that Institution would be seriously put in jeopardy. It's simply a risk I am not willing to take. There is no room for your social experiments here in the U.S. of A.

Grace said...

Blair Warner kicks ass. So does polygamist goat colonies.

PS. I asked my mom to marry me earlier today, and she turned me down. WTF??

Rachel M. said...

Try again, and this time throw her sister/your aunt into the deal. that's WAY more appealing.

Fannie said...

I think the real question here is whether the goats in the polygamist goat coloy are neutered. If they are neutered it would be a super-duper bad polygamist marriage.